Loss

It is more than the loss of a husband and a lover.  It is the lost of my best friend.  The person who I had planned to spend the rest of my life with.  All those hopes and dreams.  Having someone to talk to about the big things and the little things.

And one of the cruellest things is the way it steals your enjoyment for all of the things you used to love.  Simple pleasures which would help take your mind off things and  make you feel momentarily better but you just cannot summon the energy for.

Everything about this sucks.

Grieving

When a relationship ends unexpectedly the mix of emotions is overwhelming.  Shock, anger, hurt, more anger, sadness, heartbreak, misery, confusion and some strange fleeting ones like relief and freedom.  One of the hardest feelings to handle is the grief.  For the person and relationship you have lost, for the past and memories which now seem tainted and the hopes, dreams and plans you had for the future.

Yep, the grief is a difficult one.

Today's post is brought to you by Bach Rescue Remedy

Usually I relish the first day of a new school term.  A chance to get back into the routine and have some peace and quiet.

Well not today.

Things aren't quite the same here as they were a few months ago.  And when you have changes thrust upon you which you had previously only had nightmares about, you have to try and make the best of a horrific situation.

Not quite sure how I'll do that yet.